A Baby
by Cullark98girl
Summary: Peeta and Katniss have their first baby, this is the story of Katniss's first pregnancy.  The summary sucks way worse than the actual story, please read.  There are actual twists to this story, not just mindless fluff  although there is that too
1. Chapter 1

**Ok this is my first Hunger games fanfic and I am quite excited! Please tell me what you think of it! No, this will not be just another boring fluffy fic about Peeta and Kantniss's relationship with no action or drama, I have a couple tricks up my sleeve. **

**I am not Suzanne Collins; I would have killed off Gale in the first chapter if I was though.**

I wake up only to run from the bed and head straight for the bathroom. I lock the door behind me, this is the third time this week I have thrown up in the morning and I really don't want Peeta to come in again. When I'm finally done, I fall back onto the floor. I hear Peeta tapping on the door and asking to come in, but I just can't think straight right now.

After some time of me sitting on the floor, too exhausted to move, and Peeta banging loudly on the door, I get up to rinse out my mouth. I go slowly, brushing my teeth twice. I'm really dreading having to go out and see Peeta. Yesterday, when I threw up for the second time this week, he told me that if I did it again, we were going to the doctor. I hate going to the doctor, it reminds me of being in district 13, all the doctors, the completely white rooms, just so creepy.

Finally, when I cannot stall any longer, and Peeta starts threatening to go get Haymitch, I open the door.

"Jeez Katniss" Peeta is sitting on the floor by the bathroom door, looking totally defeated "I thought I was going to have to break down that door" I just smirk at him and hold my hand out to help him up.

When he is standing two inches from my face, I press my lips lightly to his "Good morning Mr. Mellark"

He grins widely "Good morning to you too Mrs. Mellark" he press his lips to mine again and wraps his arms around my waist. He still loves calling me Ms. Mellark, even though we have been married for almost a year now.

It wasn't a big thing, we just went down to the Justice Building and signed the papers, pronouncing us as legally married. For some reason, the fact that the star-crossed lovers getting married was enough to make a whole country swoon. For weeks, Peeta and I were the focus of all news reports. I still don't get it, Plutarch said that Panem just needed to know that if we, who have been through so much, could move on, then so could the rest of them.

Peeta smiles and takes me hand, leading me downstairs "After breakfast you are going straight to the doctor's office" when I groan he rolls his eyes and adds "I can go with you if you want"

Although the idea of Peeta coming with me sounds much more appealing than me going alone, there is one matter in the way. "Don't you have to work?" Peeta reopened the bakery a few months after we moved back to district 12, after a few years it is now up and running, business better than it was even before.

"No, I'm sure Delly will be able to manage for today." Delly started working in the bakery soon after it was opened; she always takes over when Peeta can't make it. I just nod as he sets a cup of hot chocolate in front of me, along with two rolls. One look at the rolls and my appetite is completely gone, I have to get up and run to the kitchen sink. I vomit into the sink while Peeta holds my hair back from my face, its quick since there isn't really anything in my stomach to come out. "Katniss I think we should go now to the doctor, there must really be something wrong." I can see the worry on Peeta's face so I decide to agree with him.

"Alright" I sigh, because I know he is right, it's not normal to just vomit all over the place, even I know that.

We go upstairs to get dressed, I wear my usual jeans and shirt with my hunting boots, while Peeta wears his khaki pants and white button down shirt. I smile at him as he fiddles with one of the buttons on his shirt, having trouble trying to get it in the proper hole. I go over to help him and he kisses me on my forehead. I look up at him and smile, I love how natural we can be, we don't even need words for each other to know what the other is thinking. Sometimes though, it is helpful to hear it out loud "I love you" I whisper.

He kisses my on my lips, gingerly "I love you too" he says, before wrapping his arm around my torso to lead me out of the room.

We make our way through town with only a few glances our way. We are completely lionized here in district 12, it's like we are movie stars. I hear people saying all the time "Look it's the mockingjay!" or "Wow, the girl on fire!" When Peeta and I are together though, people normally refer to us as the star-crossed lovers or something really heroic. Peeta usually smiles and waves at them, I just look down at my feet.

When we get into the hospital, the receptionist looks as if she might have a heart attack. "Oh my! Peeta Mellark! Katniss Everdeen!"

"Um it's Katniss Mellark" Peeta says through clenched teeth. Sometimes it can be flattering when people recognize us or are excited to see us, but Peeta hates when people call me Katniss Everdeen.

"Oh yes I-I'm so sorry" it's obvious that this women is from district 4. She has their trademark green eyes, it reminds me of Finnick. "Is there anything I can help you with?"

I look up at her and smile a little, she looks so worried, like she has upset the president or something. "We would like to see a doctor" I say.

"Katniss is sick" Peeta adds, taking hold of my hand.

"Of-of course, right this way" the woman leads us down a hallway and into a white room with a bed in the middle. I sit down on the edge of it and sigh; I hate these stupid hospital rooms. "The doctor will be right with you" with that, the scared little lady runs from the room.

I look at Peeta as a smile creeps onto his lips "Some people are just so weird" he says, as he sits in the little chair next to the bed. I smile and nod in agreement just as the doctor comes in.

"Well hello Mr. and Mrs. Mellark" he greets us, shaking Peeta's hand "It's nice to meet you. What seems to be the problem?"

Peeta explains to the doctor about my throwing up and how I have been so tired all the time. I see the doctor start to smile as Peeta finishes the end of the story.

"Well, Mrs. Mellark sounds to me like you have a baby on the way." He smirks as I gape at him. "Here take this" he hands me a little cup "Pee in it, I know it's weird but it can determine whether or not you are pregnant." Peeta and I just stare at him and I guess he takes this as his cue to leave. "Um, the bathroom is down the hall, just give the cup to the receptionist when you are done and I will have your results in about ten minutes." Then he just walks out.

I'm speechless. Pregnant? No, I cannot be pregnant. Peeta and I have only been married a year, we only just started talking about a family. I do not want to have a little baby. I can't handle a baby. What about the games? What about the revolution? What about Prim? Even if Snow isn't president, to many things have happened for me to truly believe that this baby can really be safe.

I look at Peeta and see that he is smiling from ear to ear. "Katniss! A baby! We're going to have a baby!" he throws his arms around me and dusts my face with kisses, the eyelids, my cheeks, and then finally landing on my lips. "I know you didn't exactly want a baby so soon but think about it. I think we are ready. This is so exciting!"

"Wait! I don't even know if I'm pregnant yet. Maybe this whole thing can just be a big mistake. I still have to pee in this stupid cup." Peeta looks a little hurt by my words. He doesn't want to think of this as a mistake, he is really happy about me being pregnant. "I'm just nervous Peeta" I explain "You know I never wanted a baby" he just nods and looks at the floor while I go to the bathroom.

After I have left the cup with the receptionist I walk back to the room where Peeta is waiting for me. He looks kind of sad, but at the same time, he looks excited. I go over to sit on his lap and his arms encircle me. I lean in to him and sigh. "Peeta," I whisper, he looks up at me "I-I'm actually excited. About the baby. I want a baby" After the words leave my mouth, I know that they are true. He looks so happy and he kisses me passionately on the lips.

"I'm excited too" he whispers back.

Just then, the doctor walks back in, and I jump up from Peeta's lap. "Alright Katniss would you like the results?" I just nod, too nervous to say anything "Alright, you are pregnant. I was correct" he smiles as he sees Peeta jump up from the chair to hug me, tears filling his eyes. "I'll leave you two alone."

Peeta and I stand there for a long time in each other's arms. I see a tear roll down his cheek and I wipe it away with my thumb "Why are you crying?" I ask "I should be the one crying"

He chuckles a little bit before saying "You don't know how long I have waited for this moment" he kisses me softly on the lips and adds "I can't believe you are going to have my child"

**Thank you everyone for reading! Please Please Please Review!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello! Thank you all soooo much for reviewing! Seriously I am so happy! I am sorry it took me so long to post this chapter, but I hope you all like it **

_I am in the meadow holding my little baby, my little Peeta. He really does look just like him, with the blonde curls and bright blue eyes. Suddenly, I feel arms encircle me from behind and I know who it is. I lean in to him and smile, completely content._

"_I love you Katniss"_

"_I love you too Peeta" I turn to give him a kiss and when our lips touch, I know that everything is going to be absolutely perfect for the rest of my life._

My eyes flutter open and I smile to myself. A good dream, wow. I haven't had a good dream since the pregnancy started. They've all been about the baby in the games, or the baby getting mauled by mutts, or Snow taking the baby. Now, I am reassured. I feel like I can really do this. I can have a baby with Peeta, and our baby will grow up and be happy and never scared or hurt or hungry or anything that my childhood was filled with.

I think about the little baby boy in my dreams. The baby always goes from a girl to a boy, ranging from an exact copy of Peeta, to the carbon copy of myself as a baby. I really do hope that I have a baby boy, a little Peeta.

We'll be finding out today, whether it's a boy or a girl. I can't wait, I'm incredibly excited, but at the same time, I'm overwhelmingly nervous. Every time there is some sort of milestone with the pregnancy, I always freak out and go into major worry mode. When I first felt the baby kick, I practically had a meltdown. I know that today will be no different, I will freak out just as much, if not more.

I turn to see Peeta sleeping peacefully, and I can't help myself. I lift my head off the pillow and kiss him lightly on the lips. He sighs, but doesn't wake up. I immediately kiss him again, hoping for a better reaction. I kiss him longer and harder, but still, nothing.

I get up and stradle is waist, pressing my lips eagerly to his, keeping them there for as long as I can. Suddenly, I feel his hand cup my face, the other is in my hair. He leans up from the bed, so that I'm more sitting on his lap, and he places a hand on my stomach, our lips still locked together.

When I know I can't hold on any longer, I pull away to breathe. He smiles at me "Well good morning to you too" before giving me one last peck. He grabs hold of my waist and slides me off. I groan and he just smiles innocently at me "Katniss, we have to get ready to go to the doctor."

"Yeah but can't we just be lazy for a little while longer?" I'm hoping he'll give in and come back to lay with me in the bed, when he just shakes his head.

"I'll tell you what Katniss, how about I go make breakfast and you take a shower." A shower does sound good right now so I just nod. He grabs my hand and kisses it before walking out to make breakfast.

I walk over to the shower and think about my dream. Only seven and a half more months until I can really hold my baby in my arms. Even though I am already two and a half months pregnant, you can barely see my bump. It isn't exactly non-existent but it's small.

The warm water feels incredibly relaxing against my back and I swirl little images on my stomach with the water that drips onto it. I start to realize how hungry I am about half way through my shower, so I rush through the rest of it.

I immediately pull on a pair of my new stretchy pants, and one of my flowy pregnancy shirts. I've been wearing these every time I have to go into town, so that people don't see my baby bump. Peeta and I decided to keep it a secret for now. When we first told people that we were engaged, Plutarch immediately sent cameras over to interview us, district 12 was filled with reporters for weeks. We decided that we want to wait until I am at least five months pregnant to tell anyone that we haven't told yet, those people only consisting of Haymitch and my mother.

My mom was the first person I called when I got home from the hospital, the day we found out; and she was thrilled. We told Haymitch a few weeks ago, because he told me I looked like I had put on a few pounds and I burst into tears. If it hadn't been for my stupid pregnancy hormones, I would have had a snide comeback to throw in his direction, but instead I just couldn't stop crying.

As I walk downstairs to the kitchen, the smell of delicious cheese buns wafts through the air. I sit down at the table just as Peeta sets a plate full of yummy breakfast things in front of me.

"Thanks" I say before I stuff my face. He just smiles and digs in to his food.

"How was your shower?" he asks me.

"Wet" I answer, he laughs and I can't help but laugh with him.

"So, you didn't have any nightmares last night?" he says it more like a statement than a question and I nod.

"No, I had a good dream about us and the baby" a smile creeps onto his face and he takes my hand in his.

"Do you think it'll be a boy or a girl?" he asks me

"I don't know, I'm hoping for a boy. A little boy, just like you" he wrinkles his nose and shakes his head.

"No way, it has to be a girl. A little Katniss" I smile as he uses the term I used for my imaginary baby boy – a little Peeta.

He gets up when we've both finished and cleans off our plates. "We should get going now; I really want to know if it's a boy or girl."

"Yes we should, but maybe you should think of getting dressed first." He looks down at his bare chest and laughs

"I didn't even notice" he says, while chuckling.

When he is back downstairs in the proper attire for a walk through town, I grab his hand and head out the door.

As we start to make our way through District 12, to the hospital, we pass a family walking in the same direction as us. I smile at the little girl and her mother, who looks like she is about to give birth right where she stands. She has to be at least eight months pregnant, and she is wearing the same kind of shirt as mine.

The little girl holding her hand, who looks about five, taps her arm. "Yes, Lucy?" the mom looks down at her daughter and picks her up.

"Mommy, is that lady going to have a baby like you?" the little girl asks as she points at me.

Her mom looks to where she is pointing and when she sees me looking at her, her eyes widen. "Lucy, don't point…its rude. And, n-no. That is Katniss Mellark, the mockingjay" she smiles nervously at me as she looks down at her daughter.

"Mommy, what's the mockingjay?" her mom just laughs

"Oh nothing" and then they turn in the opposite direction from us and walk away.

Even though I have been wishing for a little boy for the past two and a half months, I suddenly find myself wanting a daughter. A little girl who will look at me and talk to me and learn from me, just as Lucy does with her mother.

We turn into the hospital and walk to the reception desk. "Why hello, Mr. and Mrs. Mellark" the new receptionist greets us.

"Hi" Peeta smiles at her "We have an appointment with Dr. Spruill."

"Of course" she says, and she leads us down a long hall to the sterile white room. "The doctor will be with you momentarily"

We wait in silence, both too nervous to speak. Peeta starts fidgeting with a strand of my hair, when the doctor walks in.

"Hello again you two" he smiles at us

"Hello Dr. Spruill" Peeta says

"Well Katniss, I'm going to need you to get your shirt up so we can get a good look at your stomach." I lift my shirt up and lie back. He squirts this cold, blue jelly on to my stomach and presses a metal thing onto it. All of a sudden, there is a picture up on the screen by the bed.

"Um what is that?" I ask

"That is your baby"

"That?" I ask "That looks like a little animal" they both laugh and I can see the excitement on Peeta's face.

"Well, the baby looks healthy to me" says the doctor, at that Peeta's smile brightens even more. "Would you like to know the gender?" the doctor asks us

"Yes!" we both say in unison

The doctor chuckles and says "You are going to be having a…boy!"

A boy? A boy! I'm so excited and I grab Peeta's hand and give it a little squeeze. He looks at me and smiles, tears in his eyes. "I knew it" I say

"I'll leave you two alone" the doctor says, giving us our privacy again. He walks out after wiping the goo off my stomach.

"Katniss, we are having a son, a baby, a little baby boy." Peeta smiles at me, and what is happening finally sinks in.

A son. A little baby boy. There is going to be someone in this world who will be calling me mommy. Someone who will depend on me for the entirety of his life. Depend on me for everything. And, although I am used to being depended upon, this is something totally new. How will I do it? It's not like I had a great mother to model myself after, and Peeta's mom was probably worse than mine. How will I know what to do? What if I'm a bad mom? My son will need me to teach him things and love him and feed him and protect him and-and…I don't even know what else a mom is supposed to do.

Suddenly I start to cry, and Peeta looks at me, confused. "Peeta, what am I going to do? I don't know how to be a mom." He pulls me into his arms and gives me a tight hug. I rest my head under his chin and continue to cry.

"Katniss it's alright. Shh, everything is going to be ok. I'll be there. If you need help with something I'll always be there. Don't worry" he continues to try to soothe me, but I just keep thinking of things that could possibly ever be a problem for my little son.

"What about the games? What about Snow? What if something happens and I can't protect him?" I'm sobbing uncontrollably now and I can't breathe easily.

"Katniss, Katniss look at me." Peeta takes my chin in his hand and tilts my head so I'm forced to look him in the eye "There are no more games, and there is no more president Snow. Paylor is the president now, and she is a great president. She'll make sure the baby is safe" he kisses me lightly on the lips and touches my stomach, rubbing it. "I promise our son will be safe. I'll make sure of it"

He looks so sure of himself, so determined to keep our baby safe, that I have to believe him. I know in the back of my head that there will always danger for our baby, but for now he will be safe. He will be happy and healthy and loved. This thought makes me smile, the thought of Peeta and me with our son, happy and safe.

**Alright thank you all for reading and please review!**

**Yes, I know what you're thinking - KATNISS AND PEETA HAVE A DAUGHTER FIRST!**

**I guess you'll just have to keep reading to see what's going to happen hehe I'm evil**


	3. Chapter 3

**Ok so I realize that usually you aren't able to know the gender of the baby until much later, but this is the future so just pretend!**

**Also, I am really sorry that it took me so long to update but now that it is Christmas break I will have much more time to write so expect more updates**

I wake up to my own screams and Peeta's comforting words. "Shh Katniss it's alright calm down, it was only a dream. Sh Sh its ok" just a dream, it was just a dream. Even though I know I was dreaming, I can't get the image of Prim standing in a mess of flames, screaming for me to help her. I keep hearing her pleading calls begging me to save her.

I finally calm down after a few minutes and weakly smile up at Peeta. He smiles back at me and brushes my cheek with the back of his hand "Only six more months" he whispers, before patting my stomach. Suddenly, my stomach lurches and I jump up from the bed "Katniss? Katniss what's wrong?"

I can't answer as I am violently sick in the bathroom. _That's weird_ I think, _usually only scents set off my morning sickness _

I pick myself off the floor and wash my mouth out in the sink. "Are you alright?" Peeta asks as he walks into the bathroom.

"I don't know" I reply "My stomach still really hurts" most of the time, when I have morning sickness, I feel fine after wards. Now, it feels almost unbearable as I feel wave after wave of pain washing over me.

I grab hold of the sink for support and close my eyes. "Katniss? Are you alright?" with my free hand I clutch my stomach, which feels like it is about to explode inside of me.

I sink down to the ground in a sudden rush of pain and clutch my stomach. "Ah – ah Peeta, call the doctor"

"What? Now? Why?" my frustration is growing as Peeta just stands there looking frightened.

"Ow! Peeta just call Dr. Spruill, I-I it's the baby, something's wrong"

I can just make out Peeta running out of the bathroom, before everything goes completely black.

* * *

><p>"I'm so sorry Peeta, I'll leave you alone to tell her" I can hear a familiar voice whispering as I feel myself regain consciousness.<p>

"Ok, thank you doctor" Peeta's voice sounds so rocky and full of grief, that even though I am still in pain, I will myself to open my eyes.

"Peeta? What happened, where are we?" I look around and before I am through my sentence, I see that I am in a white hospital room. Peeta walks up to me and grabs my hand in his; tears begin to stream down his cheeks.

"Katniss, something happened to the baby and –and" his voice breaks off as more tears begin to fall, some landing on our intertwined fingers.

"What? Peeta, what happened? Is he ok?" he shakes his head from side to side slowly

"He's gone" more tears stream violently from his eyes, and his clutch on my hand tightens before he finishes "You had a miscarriage"

With that, he falls to his knees and buries his head in the bed sheets. I can't stand to see him this way, but I don't know what to do; I don't know what to say. I just stroke the mess of hair on top of his head and try to calm him down.

"Katniss, I already loved him so much. H-how could this have happened?" I can barely make out his raspy words. I know how much Peeta cared about our baby, and even though I loved him also, I could never love him as much as Peeta did. He wanted me to have his children from the moment he realized that he loved me, and even now I'm still not sure if I ever really wanted kids.

"Peeta, I'm so sorry…I loved him too" I couldn't think of anything else to say

"No, Katniss. You don't understand, I've wanted this baby for so long and-and I was finally going to be a father."

Peeta finally lifts his head up enough for me to see his eyes, and the pain in them is unbearable. I hold open my arms and signal for him to come up onto the bed with me. It's odd, like our parts are reversed. He climbs slowly onto the hospital bed, and lies back. Slowly, he closes his eyes and I rest my head on his chest, his arms encircling me.

"I'm sorry Peeta" I whisper, before we both drift off to sleep.

* * *

><p><strong>Two Weeks Later<strong>

Peeta hadn't been coping well with the miscarriage. He spent all of his time at the bakery and wouldn't let me down to visit him there. He'd been acting so detached, and he wouldn't even let me talk to him about it.

It happened one day when I came back from hunting. I walked in to the house and was surprised to find a fire lit in the living room, Peeta wasn't supposed to be home from the bakery for another couple hours.

I walked in to the kitchen to find him and immediately wished I hadn't. His back was to me and he was clutching on to the counter so hard that his knuckles were turning white. His breathing was jagged and his shoulders were heaving up and down.

I could tell that he wasn't himself. He was the hijacked Peeta, the Capitol's Peeta.

He turned around and when he saw me, his eyes grew wide with terror. There was different stages when Peeta would go into his hijacked mode. The first one would always be for him to get frightened. He wouldn't just get frightened of anything, it was always the same thing that set off his terror; me.

"Don't kill me…please don't kill me" he started backing away from me and when his back hit the counter, he stopped and looked around, trying to find a way to escape.

"Peeta, listen to me. I am not going to kill you. We are married and we love each other. Please remember Peeta. I'm not going to kill you, I swear." His eyebrows furrowed in confusion and then his eyes narrowed.

"You killed my baby. You are a monster" my breath caught at his words

"No Peeta, it-it was our baby. I had a miscarriage, please remember"

"Ours? I would never have a baby with you, you disgust me" Oh no. Now he was getting angry. He always got angry just after he was scared. His nostrils flared and his hands clenched in to fists.

"Peeta please! Please come back! I can't take this right now" tears started streaming down my face.

Then, Peeta started laughing and I could feel him walking closer to me "Aw is poor little Katniss crying?" when I didn't answer, he shoved me. I was so surprised at his actions that I barely realized when he pushed me again, this time my back hit the wall.

"Peeta, stop" it was barely a whisper now, I could hardly breathe with my tears falling in a permanent stream down my cheeks.

"You want me to stop?" he screamed, incredulously "You didn't stop when you killed my family. You killed everyone and you are a terrible person!" his words cut deep into me, worse than any knife.

"You killed everyone and now, now I'm going to kill you" he snarled before trying to grab hold of my neck.

I ran, ran from the kitchen and ran from Peeta. This was the worse stage of all. Once he got angry, if I didn't get him to snap back to reality, he would become murderous. He would try to kill me, and it was always the hardest to bring him back once he slipped into this stage.

One time, I had tried to show him a picture in our memory book. It was a picture of us along with all of the other tributes we had come to love, Peeta had drawn it himself. When he saw it, he ripped it up and told me I was lying about loving them, that it was my fault they were dead.

Now, I didn't know what to do. I heard him come bounding up the stairs, so as I closed the door to our room, I made sure to lock it as well. He began banging on the door "Katniss come out! We can do this the easy way or the hard way!"

I looked around the room frantically, trying to find something to bring him back. My eyes fell on a little box. A little box that I kept by my bed.

Peeta always asked me what was in the box, but I never told him. Now, it seemed like the perfect way to bring him back. I grabbed the box and clutched it in my hands, before yanking the door open.

He was there, snarling and pacing, murmuring to himself.

"Peeta, look" he turned around at the sound of my voice and stared at the little box in my hand. "Remember? You always ask me what's inside this box. Do you want to know?"

I knew that he remembered because a look of recognition crossed his face and then he frowned. "What do you think I am? An idiot? What's in there, some sort of mini bomb?"

"Peeta, just look" I opened the small velvet covered box to reveal a tiny, perfect pearl.

"You gave me this pearl in the Quarter Quell and I kept it. I kept it through everything, and while you were gone, it was the only thing that kept me sane – it reminded me of you; I kept fighting because of you. Please Peeta, I need you. Fight this for me, just remember"

Tears were streaming down my cheeks and I felt a warm, calloused thumb wipe one away. "I remember. I gave it to you on the beach. Real or not real"

"Real" I whispered, I looked at him and saw that tears were also falling from his eyes.

"You kept this?" he says it as a question but it comes out more like a statement.

"Yes" is all I can say.

"I'm sorry Katniss. I'm sorry for everything. I'm sorry for not being able to control myself, for slipping away like that. You know I didn't mean any of what I said, right?"

"I know Peeta. I'm sorry about the baby. I know you don't want to talk about it, and I know that you didn't mean what you said about me killing it, but I just want you to know that I'm sorry and that I really did love him." A final tear escapes before I can finish "And I love you"

Peeta breaks down. This always happens after he has one of his hijacking episodes. I consider it to be one of the stages – the final stage - but it only happens after he's brought back to reality. He cries. He sobs. He tells me how sorry he is. I always want to help him, but I know that he just needs to cry himself out.

So I hold his hand in mine and lead him into our room. I carefully put the pearl back into its box and lay it carefully down on my bedside table. I crawl into bed next to Peeta and wrap my arms around him. He tucks my head into the space between his collarbone and chin, and his tears soak my hair.

These kinds of moments are the ones that remind me why I did any of it. Why I worked so hard to defeat the Capitol, to defeat Snow. Because seeing Peeta like this – so hurt and vulnerable, it makes all of the anger come back. It reminds me why the Capitol was so terrible. What they did to innocent people-innocent children, it makes everything worthwhile.

It makes me want to keep living. To give Peeta a child, to make Peeta as happy as I could ever possibly make him. I want to have a baby and give that baby the life I never had. I want to give hope and joy and love to Peeta and to the baby that I know will be here someday.

So, when Peeta asks me "Can we try again?" I know exactly what he means.

"Yes Peeta. I want to, I really want to"

And with that, he stopped crying.

**Thank you everyone for reading and please review! I barely got any reviews for the second chapter and I really would like to hear what you guys think**

**If you review, you will get free cookies**

**Well, virtual cookies I guess**

**FREE VIRTUAL COOKIES MADE BY PEETA MELLARK TO THOSE WHO REVIEW **


	4. Chapter 4

**First off I would like to apologize for taking so long to update. I would also like to thank you all SO MUCH for the reviews! I can't tell you how happy it makes me, so please continue to review **

**Also, I want to clear something up…some people thought that Katniss should have taken the miscarriage differently. Well, it's not that she wasn't upset, it's just that when she found out, she was sort of in shock. So now I will let you read this chapter, I tried to make this happier to make up for the last chapter which was pretty depressing. **

I knock again on Delly's door, impatiently waiting for her to open it. I'm still not exactly sure what I want to tell her, but I know I'll need her help to carry out my plan if I want it to actually work.

Finally, Delly opens her door and looks surprised to see me "Oh, hi Katniss" she smiles her huge friendly smile and gestures for me to enter the house. She lives in her old house, or a new house built where the old one used to be. It's a bit larger and nicer than the old one, but it still pales in comparison to those of the Victor's Village.

She sits down on a couch in her living room and I sit next to her. There are a few moments of uncomfortable silence before I realize that she's waiting for me to explain my random visit.

"I need help." I say. When she raises her eyebrows and cocks her head to the side, I continue "I want to make a nice dinner for Peeta, and a cake" she stills looks confused, so I elaborate "Well I'm not the best cook, and you and I both know that I can't bake."

Understanding crosses her face and she smiles "Of course I can help you Katniss! But what's the special occasion?"

I bite my lip to hold in my smile, before answering "I'm pregnant."

* * *

><p>Delly and I sit in the living room, waiting for the lamb stew to be done. It took a long time to decide what I wanted to make. I wanted it to be special, something that could bring back good memories. Even though lamb stew is sort of a private joke that we have about my favorite meal from the Capitol, a reference to our first games; it's still my favorite meal and it is special to us.<p>

Thinking about this makes me think back to our first games, back when our relationship first started. Looking back at it, at our first two years, I realize that I truly loved him all along. When I would feel that thing in the pit of my stomach during some of our kisses, in both games. When I knew I would never be able to kill him in those first games, when I refused to hurt him. When I made a decision to save him, to keep him alive in the Quarter Quell. When I couldn't function because he was gone, because he had been captured.

I don't know why it was so hard for me to accept the fact that I loved him. It had seemed such a foreign emotion back then. I was too scared to feel it, to love anyone; especially someone who could so easily be taken from me.

I'm pulled from my thoughts when I hear Delly's voice "Are you alright Katniss?"

"Hmm? Oh, yeah. Just thinking" I reply, sighing.

"About?" she asks.

"Peeta. About us, how crazy it is that we are here; married and all. I guess I just never thought it would happen to me, to us"

She nods and smiles, she is about to say something else when I smell something burning.

"Do you smell that?" I ask, standing up.

"Yeah" she says slowly "Smells like…burning" she says and we run to the kitchen.

There's smoking puffing from the dish, and I quickly put on oven mitts. I grab the pot and move it from the hot surface of the stove. Delly is occupied, trying to get the stove to turn off, and I remove the lid.

The chunks of lamb are all black. Not one salvageable piece. I groan and slam the lid back on, glancing at the clock. Peeta is due to be home from the bakery in less than an hour.

Finally, the oven stops beeping and Delly comes over to where I'm standing; glaring at the ruined meal in front of me.

"It's ok Katniss, we can make something else. Something easier…?" she looks at me sympathetically, with her eyebrows furrowed.

I shake my head, "No, we still have to do the cake" I say, leaning on the counter with my elbows, holding my head up with my hands.

"Maybe we should get started on the cake. I don't think Peeta will mind if the stew is a little overcooked." I can tell that she's trying to be nice and helpful, but for some reason, she's just making me really annoyed.

"You call that overcooked?" I hiss "It's completely burnt! It's ruined" I turn around so that my back is facing the counter, and sink down to the ground, taking my head in my hands once again, resting my elbows on my bent knees. "I don't think Peeta is going to want to eat cake for dinner" I say, now holding back tears.

I don't know why I'm being so emotional, it really isn't that big of a deal, and I know this. I just can't seem to control myself as the tears streak down my cheeks.

"Oh Katniss, its ok! Don't cry, Peeta won't mind" Delly seems nothing else but flustered and I feel bad for going crazy over this.

"I know, I'm sorry. I just wanted it to be perfect; I want everything to be right this time"

"D-do you want to make the cake now?" she asks hesitantly.

I nod and she holds her hand down to me. I slowly get up and smile apologetically at her "I'm sorry" I say.

"Well, you are pregnant, so I guess your hormones might make you a little bit crazy" we both laugh and start to get the ingredients for the cake out.

Apparently, cakes are quite messy to make. By the time we are done there is flour everywhere, two broken eggs on the floor – they got slippery when I tried to crack them – and a lot of batter from when the mixer went haywire. But at least we have a finished product this time.

I remove the cake from the oven carefully, and peer down at the masterpiece in my hands. Its vanilla - Peeta's favorite. It looks just like the ones he brings home from the bakery, perfectly shaped and colored. I gingerly set it down on the counter and turn to Delly.

"Well?" she asks expectantly.

"It's perfect." I say. She smiles hugely and throws her arms around me, squealing.

"But we still have to frost it!" I say, glancing at the clock. Only ten minutes, if Peeta comes home right on time.

"Right" she says, nodding her head once before turning to get the bowls filled with frosting. "What color?"

"How about blue with pink writing?" I obviously don't know if it's a boy or a girl yet, so I might as well decorate it both ways.

"Yes!" she says, taking out a frosting knife. "You can frost it and I'll write…wait what is it going to say?"

I can honestly say that I had not once thought about what the cake would actually say. I knew that I wanted it to be obvious to him that I was in fact pregnant, but how was I going to say that in _frosting_? I didn't want to be so blunt and just say something like 'I'm pregnant' that's just plan boring.

I just finished frosting the cake when I hear the door open. I look at Delly frantically and she has a determined look on her face.

"Go say hi to him tell him you have a surprise and I'll sneak out the back. I have the perfect thing to write, trust me!" she whispers.

I quickly walk to the door where Peeta is taking off his jacket "Hi Peeta" I smile.

"Hey Katniss! How was your day?" he pecks me on the lips before taking my hand in his.

"It was ok, I have a surprise for you" I say with a mischievous grin.

He raises his eyebrows and with a smile he tries to coax it out of me "What? What is it?" he asks excitedly.

I just shake my head at him "It's a surprise!" I walk slowly into the kitchen and let out a sigh of relief when I see that Delly is nowhere in sight and the cake is on the counter with a silver cover over it. "How was your day?" I ask.

"Not so great" he replies, a small crease forming between his eyebrows "This lady kept yelling at me because I got her order wrong or something. I don't know…it's been pretty hard to focus lately"

I smile knowingly "I know what you mean"

"You know what would make me feel a whole lot better?" he asks with a smirk.

I narrow my eyes at them "I think I can take a guess" his smile grows wider as I walk over to the silver platter on the counter.

"Is this my surprise?" he asks me before I lift the lid off. I just nod absentmindedly; I'm trying to lift the lid in a way so that I can see what Delly wrote without Peeta seeing. When I finally have it up just enough, I smile widely at the words written in Delly's perfect hand.

I pull the cover off all the way, and turn the cake so that the writing is facing him. A look of confusion crosses his face before his eyes widen in shock.

"Is-are…Katniss?" he looks up at me with the biggest smile I've ever seen on his face.

I nod and before I can answer him fully, he's crushing me against his body, hugging me tightly to him. "So, you like your surprise?" I ask sarcastically, after he lets me go.

"Yes! Katniss, when did you find out?"

"Today. I figured a couple of days ago; I just went to the doctor to make sure"

"How far are you?"

I shrug; I hadn't actually asked the doctor "I think something like a month and a half"

Peeta suddenly pulled me into another hug, kissing my forehead "I love you" he whispers into my hair "No matter what happens" and I know what he means. He's thinking of the baby, of what could possibly happen again.

"I love you too Peeta" I turn my head upwards toward him and lightly kiss him. I pull away and get out a knife, to cut the cake with. "I hope you like it. I made it today"

"_You_ made this?" he says after taking a smile bite "Really Katniss? Who did you ask for help?" he asks with a smug grin.

I scowl at him and shrug stubbornly. "Are you saying that I can't bake a cake on my own?"

He chuckles "Delly?" he asks, expectantly.

"Yes" I reply sourly, turning away to get more cake.

"Aww come on Katniss" he grabs me by the waist and turns me to face him. I can't help but scowl again at the humor in his eyes "It doesn't matter if Delly helped, it was still you who did it"

I shrug, looking past him and he chuckles, using his finger to tilt my head so that I'm forced to look at him. He kisses my softly on the lips, and I can't stop myself from melting in to the kiss.

He reaches past me to cut off another piece of cake "Wait!" I exclaim, stopping his hand before he can cut into the frosting words. "I want to keep the words there. Cut around them"

He cuts a small piece, leaving just the words now. I know he wants to keep them there too, I know it must make him happy to read it – _Peeta, future #1 Daddy_

**YAY! No more sad Peeta Ok, I know that Katniss is really OOC throughout this whole story, but…you have to admit that a fluffy Katniss and Peeta are super cute! Plus this is a **_**fanfiction**_** so I can do whatever I want! Haha**

**I'll try to update soon. If I get a lot of reviews tomorrow, I might update on Monday :) SO REVIEW!**


	5. Chapter 5

**I know I said I would update Monday but work is annoying and life gets in the way…so here is a new chapter only two days late! :)**

I'm met by the smell of freshly baked cheese buns as I make my way into the house. I drop my hunting bag on the ground in the kitchen, its filled as I haven't had time to drop stuff with Greasy Sae yet. I look around, expecting to see Peeta.

"Peeta?" I call out when I don't see him anywhere.

"Uh – up here Katniss!" I hear Peeta's voice drift down from the second floor and turn to make my way up the stairs.

I find Peeta where he usually is, his painting room.

"Hey" I say, walking in to find him facing the door, painting on a canvas. He looks up when he hears my voice and smiles, his dazzling smile making my own lips turn up. "What're you painting?"

"Oh, I had an idea" he turns the easel around so that I can see the painting.

Its pretty simple. Just a picture of the two of us in the meadow, surrounded by flowers. We're both laughing and it looks like we're having a picnic.

"Hey, I have an idea" I say slyly "Wanna have a picnic in the meadow?" Peeta grins widely and makes his way over to the door where I'm standing. He wraps his arms around my waist and rests his forehead on mine.

"How did you know?" he whispers. I can't help but smirk at him before pressing my lips to his. He starts to deepen the kiss after a few seconds and I pull away. He looks confused, I smile and start walking backwards, pulling him with me by his hand.

"I believe we have a picnic to get to. We wouldn't want to get there after the sun goes down, now would we?" he chuckles and follows me down the stairs.

* * *

><p>We end up sitting just beneath the huge willow tree in the middle of the meadow. Peeta sits with his back resting against the tree as I lay my head in his lap. We eat and laugh and play around, just like in his painting.<p>

Finally, there's only one cheese bun left and we both reach for it at the same time. I giggle, snatching it from under his surprised hand.

"Well, I never!" Peeta gasps, feigning disbelief. I split the bun down the middle; just to humor Peeta, and stuff my half into my mouth. "Oh, now there are those manners Effie is always bragging about! You eat just like a classy Capitol citizen, Katniss."

I sit up, playfully smacking Peeta on the arm. "Eating for two now, remember?"

"Oh, I wanted to talk to you about that" Peeta says, suddenly becoming more serious.

"Yeah?" I ask, repositioning myself to sit across from Peeta with my legs crossed underneath me.

"Well, you know how we were planning on not telling anyone?" Peeta says slowly. I nod, so he continues "I was thinking that maybe we should tell Plutarch"

"What? Now? Why?" I'm confused; Peeta had been the one to originally suggest waiting to tell everyone. Now, here I am; barely even two months pregnant and he already wants to tell all of Panem.

"I – um, well…I thought maybe if we told people, it would be more real. You know, more set in stone" For once, Peeta seems to be at a loss for words. He doesn't know how to explain his reasons. But it's alright, because I already know what he means.

He thinks that by telling people, it will solidify the fact that I'm actually pregnant. That if everyone knows about the baby, we can't lose it. Even though it won't change anything, I know how he feels. I can see how that would make it seem real for Peeta, he likes other people to be able to confirm things for him. Sometimes he doesn't believe me that I was actually pregnant, when his mind gets fogged and his memory becomes fuzzy. I see his confusion. Things are better for him when more people can reinforce the fact that something did happen. It makes it more real for him.

"I understand Peeta" I whisper. I nod and smile for him "We can call Plutarch when we get home if you'd like"

His smile returns and he nods eagerly "I think if they get all the interviews and everything out of the way now, it'll be better anyway."

I lie back down in his lap and see that the sun is beginning to set.

"Look Peeta, the sunset" he lifts his eyes from my face and smiles at the beautiful colors dancing across the sky.

He begins to play with a few strands of my hair as we watch the sunset together. "I wish I could freeze this moment right here and stay in it forever"

I'm taken back to another scene on another day, much like this one. A day that was spent relaxing together, trying not to worry about the immediate danger and just enjoy the day. I spend a moment marveling at how much things have changed. We have no worries now and everything seems almost perfect.

Peeta breaks through my reverie with a question that catches me off guard.

"Sorry Peeta, what?" I ask, thinking that I must have heard him wrong.

"I asked if you've thought of names yet" Nope, definitely heard him right.

"It's a little early to be thinking about that now, don't you think?" I really don't want to think about the baby having a name. Names mean personalities. Personalities mean decisions and choices. I still don't feel ready to be thinking of parenting a child, shaping a life. I'm still scared.

Peeta's brow furrows for a moment before he answers "Well, we don't have to actually come up with a name. Just what we like and what we don't like, stuff like that."

I think for a moment. When we first found out we were having a baby, my immediate thought was of a little Prim. I remember her as a baby, and I had at first wanted to name my own child after her. In her memory. Now, it doesn't seem like such a good idea. It would be like a constant reminder, like every time I saw her, I would only think of Prim.

"I don't want to name her after anyone" I say after some thought.

"Her?" Peeta asks.

"Oh, well I guess I like to think of it as being a girl." I hadn't realized that my subconscious had begun to create my little girl without my knowledge.

"I thought you wanted a boy" Peeta inquired.

I had originally wanted a boy, a little Peeta. And while I still want a little Peeta, there is just something about the thought of having a boy. Its different now.

Like, whenever I picture a baby boy, I feel like I'm picturing _him_. The other baby. I start to feel bad, to feel guilty. It's as if we're replacing him.

"Peeta, do you ever feel like we're replacing him?" I ask quietly.

Peeta thinks for a moment before shaking his head. "No, we aren't replacing him. He'll always be the first one. And he'll live on, in here" he says, placing his warm hand on my chest, over my heart. He moves his hand to rest on my still flat stomach, before continuing "Maybe its still him. The same baby. I know its not really him, but maybe with the same personality, just a different body."

I hadn't thought of that; the same baby, just in a different body. For some reason, it comforts me. I no longer feel like we are replacing our unborn baby, just giving it a new life.

I smile, Peeta always knows just what to say to make me feel better. He always has more insight on situations.

By now, the sun is nearly gone and its getting darker by the second. I move to stand up and gather our things. Peeta helps me by putting all of the extra plates away in the basket.

He holds the basket in his left hand as we make our way down the path to the Victor's Village. I grab his right hand as we make our way to the house, walking in a comfortable silence. I can tell that Peeta is deep in thought, and I don't want to disturb him.

When we get into the house, Peeta begins to put everything away and I make my way into the sitting room, down the hall from the kitchen.

As I'm looking through the drawers to find Plutarch's number, I hear Peeta come in.

"You're really going to tell him now?" Peeta asks.

"Yes, where is his number?" Peeta walks over to a cabinet on the opposite side of the room. He opens it and pulls out a small piece of paper.

"I don't think you would have found it in that drawer" Peeta jokes. I roll my eyes and scowl at him, before dialing the number.

It rings. It rings. It ri_-"Hello?"_

Plutarch's voice on the other end startles me for a moment; I hadn't talked to him in months. He had told us that if we ever had news – meaning a pregnancy – that we had better call him before telling anyone else. Since there had been no news since the wedding, we hadn't talked much.

"Oh, hi Plutarch" I said awkwardly.

"Katniss! How are you? How's Peeta? How's everything?" Plutarch sent a throng of questions my way, asking one after another before I could answer any.

"Um, we're fine." was my only reply.

Plutarch sighed "Any…_news?_" It was obvious what he was wondering, I decided to just get right to the point.

"Yes actually. Some _great_ news…"

**Thank you all for reading! Please review!**


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